Hate my job. hate simple maintenence of clean clothes, bills...
Rejected from all schools but Iowa which I may still be rejected from and don't think I want to go to if I get in although maybe, maybe.
Desperate to feel intrinsic to something.
Was just starting to go down the - my-millionaire-boyfriend-will-be-able-to-help-me-out-with-this-crushing-ennui-sponsor-me-teaching-or-something-like-that road only for him to completely freak out about commitment - quelle cliche. So that's on this weird hold while he figures out God knows what. His shrink has been enlisted to the cause. And I feel like whatever -- and also dissapointed quite a bit - and also now what? And also why bother?
So, I don't know what can make me feel better. I almost got a puppy out of all this - from said millionaire - but then I had to tell him , no -- that I'd rahter he figure out his problems than pay me off with a puppy.
But I think I'm having some kind of no one to take care of or help crisis. For seriously.
Also I'm bored of drinking. Now tell me that's not sad.
so boo-hoo. I won't kill myself and I'm sure this will let up soon enough.
love
Alexis
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