My family bullshit scrapbook

Here is a picture of Madeline. She's at a dog show wearing a dog sweater and also a dog ponytail-holder. "Probably the best day of my life" -Madeline I thought I'd kick off with this.

This is from the day of my mother's wedding to my step-dad. That's my mom and her parents. This picture is hilarious because of my fake to the fakest smile. It was an extremely small ceremony and I was the only member of the wedding party, as it were. For the majority of the ceremony I covered my ears, which is well documented photographically. I also remember doing this. I was very grossed out by the vows. I remember the point where I covered my ears - they were saying something about "sharing bread". I had an aversion at his point in my life (I am five) to things being "mushy" and shared bread seemed LITERALLY mushy. As I told my sisters and brother when we looked at this, I think this is a case of me being five, and a whole day of ceremony/ celebration that was not about me. I knew not to actively misbehave but,flower girl or not, not about me, not too hot on the whole thing. Good thing I was still out of the loop on the whole moving to New Jersey thing.

Here's me and Grammy in Cape May. I sucked those fingers forever and I really don't know how I'd ever have learned left from right if it weren't for being compelled to suck on my left hand. I can still feel which hand it is. Freud? Freud and whoever has something to say about sides of the brain? Anyway, I am trying to distract my grandmother from the story at hand with this weirdo little doll. I am the same person I was when I was four!

What an independent child! This looks like creative bliss.

Me and grammy on the front porch. I was moved to rescue this photo because, ha, this is a great example of how I dressed as a teenager. I treasured that red velour thing.

This seems very quintessential as well. I will write more on it soon, expand this post. It got later than I meant it to before I could do this tonight. * The expansion. Everything about this photo is everything. Stephanie refers to herself at this and adjacent ages as "obese". She recently called me on what I have apparently *always* said to that which is "you are athletic". Funny. But that tweety bird bathing suit. That tweety bird bathing suit was what we were dealing with when trying to have anything but the worst thing when it came to attire. I mean, my mother only took me to shop at Kids R Us THROUGH 8th grade. Which is what my interesting style - well illustrated in this pic, was borne of. It was a happy revelation that I could make something of shorts and a white t-shirt and children's barrettes. Me and the mid nineties - we got along - I could work with what they were pitching. The pose Steph's doing, with the pursed lips and the hand doing that thing - this is a pose she affected for many pictures. I also don't think it's for nothing that she has put her arm around my mother who is looking off at the baby children. That's it folks. That is it. Amazing some photographs - I know that look of hers so well... nothing like the recognition you can acheive with a photograph. My mom - always sort of looking off disengaged with some thought. She likes to go away to where she goes like this. This is really her, man. this photo is amazing. The kids are so cute. I love how I'm just there in the middle of their mayhem looking at the camera. This is a truth photo my friends. I love it. And I love my teenage fashion if you didn't guess. I really do. Oh my, my youth. I don't feel older! XO